Friday 28 November 2008

Casting aspersions

So what do you do in the modern age when you want to be creative but are too inept (and possibly too old) to start a band, paint a masterpiece, write a novel or compose a sonnet?.....Well, try your hand at a comedy podcast of course.

It's exciting to be doing this kind of thing, especially when it's with a mate. Gareth, being a life-long learner with a shiny new PhD to his name, suggested we base our podcast around the concept of some form of self-learning, in this case, philosophy.

I've always been interested in philosophy so it seems like a good idea. We create a weekly podcast that's basically about us reading and trying to understand the concepts and it acts as a basis for some comedy (think Ricky Gervais in Animals/Politics/Fame). We're not only being creative (and hopefully funny) but maybe we learn a little about something interesting on the way.

I'm aware of the incredible self indulgence in this, and to be honest, that does make it a little hard for me. Ultimately, we're doing it for our own self righteous reasons, in our own little two man coterie and I do wonder whether it makes us a) arrogant b) pompous and c) pretentious wankers.

However, I'm game for the lark as they say, and as long as I keep these, lets call them danger areas, in mind I think it should be a good laugh and actually quite rewarding. After all we're self confessed 'dummies' on the subject so not exactly trying to prove anything to anyone.

Besides, if people let this kind of self wrangling get to them, they'd never achieve anything and ultimately, whatever the outcome/perception, there is something incredibly satisfying about being creative, even if only for creativity's sake.

Top 5 - Podcasts

Russell Brand BBC Radio 2 Podcast
Baddiel & Skinner's World Cup Podcasts
The Ricky Gervais Podcast
Guardian Football Weekly Podcast
Thinking Allowed BBC Radio 4 Podcast

Wednesday 26 November 2008

Richey Edwards


I hadn't realised until today that he's now officially been 'presumed dead' as opposed to 'missing'. There's a few obituaries in the papers and on the following websites. A sad moment really.

Guardian obituary
Telegraph obituary
BBC news piece
NME photographic tribute

His parents decided to declare him presumed dead on the 23rd November 2008.

Tuesday 25 November 2008

Film Review - Juno

****
A tale of a kooky 16 year old girl called Juno, living with her father and step-mum, who falls pregnant, is unable to go through with an abortion and decides to give the child up for adoption - I can hear the groans already. I know it sounds wearisome but out of this tired concept comes a really quite charming and insightful movie.

I couldn't help but think of the endless Judd Apatow films (Superbad, 40 Year Old Virgin etc. etc.), rolled off the production line in recent times, adept at showing mindless audiences young inadequates getting themselves into all sorts of 'hilariously' awkward social scrapes. There are similarities, but crucially Juno, whilst still presenting a similar goofy humour (check the scene where she narrates on a passing gaggle of adolescent male athletes in shorts), manages to convey something extra.

Witty rather than just plain dumb, intellectually active rather than simply 'knocked up', she's a pretty guttsy young lady. In fact, a number of her peers display a certain fortitude and integrity. Chief among them is the unexpecting father, Bleeker, who is more gentlemanly than you would ever expect, or Juno's best friend who is incredibly supportive, a valuable ally in the cut throat world of the high school corridor.

In contrast, the adults come across as somehow more childish, the husband of the adoptive couple deciding to leave his wife in order to live out his unfulfilled childhood fantasy of becoming a rock star. Even Juno, who unwittingly awakens this desire in him, is mortified by his irresponsibility, her vision of the perfect parents shattered by the revelation. Yet she is strong, posting a hastily scribbled note through the wife's letterbox, "If you're still in, I'm still in."

In the end, Juno realises her naivety in disregarding any feelings she might have for her baby, but despite the heartache, she stays true to her word. Loyal Bleeker is there to comfort her when she realises her true feelings towards her unborn child and towards him.

This might sound like a biased vision but, in fact, it's simply an accurate reflection of a difficult time for young adults. To champion the film as an insight into the true morals of young people is to be as patronising as any naysayer. However, there's probably a great deal more Juno's out there than people care to realise.

Monday 24 November 2008

Wishful thinking

It's that time of year again. Relatives, like cold callers on heat (if that's not an oxymoron), confront you when you least expect it with these 6 words: "What would you like for Christmas?"

I never have a wish list to hand! I don't mean to sound like an ungrateful little blighter, but it does strike fear into my heart.

"Erm...ah...well...vouchers? Maybe? I really don't mind." Normally, this is followed by a distinct expression of disappointment down the other end of the line. An "Oh okay", perhaps or an, "Are sure you don't want something more exciting?"

Am I being flippant in response to these generous requests? I don't mean to be. The problem is, if I did say what I really wanted, I'd get a slightly different reply, but an ultimately similar result.

-"Yes, now, what I'd really like is a pair of skinny jeans, faded, but not too much, no rips. Just the right side of distressed. Or a boxset of Reggie Perrin? - Of course you can't get that in HMV but it's on Amazon marketplace. Just be careful not to get the wrong region or it won't play. Or how about the lost episodes of Hancock's Half Hour? There's a box set out now."
-"Oh.... okay.....erm, shall I just get you some vouchers?"

No, it's no good. I do feel like an ungrateful little blighter - and now a pretencious so and so to boot. I'm going to have to come up with something and fast!!!....Where's that Argos catalogue?

Friday 21 November 2008

Seasons Greetings


This, believe it or not, is a Christmas card. The first I've received this year. A definite candidate for worst greeting card ever! Yes I know it's a corporate card, sent from one of the companies we do business with, that's not the point.

Just look at it! I say it's a Christmas card but there's no mention of Christmas, nor sight of any other element that might risk the merest knat's cock of a chance for controversy!! A blander piece of turd you'll never see!!!!

I'm a hypocrit of course. I could hardly call myself religious and yet I celebrate the birth of Christ every year. Still, with this kind of thing landing on my doorstep, I'll be starting to wonder if my atheism's well placed!!

If this is the kind of bitter fruit borne from from trying to please everybody, I think it might be time to start deliberately pissing people off.

Up yours!! The lot of yer!

Leonard Rossiter


Top 5 - British Sitcoms

The Fall and Rise of Reginald Perrin
Porridge
Fawlty Towers
Hancock's Half Hour
Blackadder

Wednesday 19 November 2008

Saturday Night Jungle Fever

Scene: Sounds of the jungle - birds squawk, etc etc. Two men, dressed in formal evening wear from the waist up and oversized khaki shorts and jungle boots from the waist down sit on logs in a clearing in the middle of the jungle. They're drinking brandy and smoking cigars.

(Both talk in mock well-to-do accent but can't help slipping back into their cockney leanings - Think Pete & Dud putting it on)

1st Man: - I say, frightful weather we're having.
2nd Man: (woken from his slumber) - eh, what's that dear boy? I must have taken a post banquet nap.
1st Man - I was just thinking how terribly depressing this weather is. Raining cats and dogs all day.
- Quite, quite.
- I was at the Kipling Theatre for the matinee peformance yesterday...
- Oh yes, what d'you see?
- The Lion King... Soaked on the way out just getting to the car.
- I know. Only yesterday, I was out with my driver in the Jaguar, you know, we were caught in a terrible downpour, terrible. Tropical it was!
- Ahh shame, where were you heading?
- The Lagoon
- The Lagoon? (Looking around sheepishly) Is that the eh... new...erm...gentlemens club I keep hearing about?
- No the lagoon, it was time for my evening soak!! As it was I only need step from under the canopy.
- Well do tell me, what's that new establishment I've heard so much about, opening near where the Oryx herd are, just left of the savannah?
- Well don't you know? It's a Spearmint Rhino's!
- Ah yes, well I hear it's the talk of the upper canopy.
- Awful denizen of harlotry, I suggest you stay away my dear boy. Animals, the lot of them. Filth!
- Well I must say, I'm terribly out of my depth when it comes to anatomy. You could say I don't know a Baboon's arse from my elbow.
- My dear fellow, there's your problem. You should find yourself a nice, quiet, young lady...... stop messing around with these ruddy Baboons!!!...You must know they have a terrible reputation among the indigenous tribes...and selfish lovers to boot!
- Well I've always found them quite charming!..... Well, well, it's been a fine evening. Thank you for the feast but I must be heading off now - Wilson does so love his 'I'm a Celebrity', he'll be fraught if I don't let him drive me back home to The Brambles.
- Don't you mean The Bamboo's?...Anyway, you shouldn't let him watch that tripe you know.
- Well why ever not?
- Well, I mean, they're in a world of their own those celebrities, don't even know they're born. I don't even think they're in the real jungle.
- Oh come on, you're just being cynical.
- Well have you seen them round here on a Saturday night? Mark my words. It's all a sham. Cheerio then old bean.
- Right...yes...toodlepip old boy....(to imagined waiting butler)...Wilson! Wilson!!

Monday 17 November 2008

Film Review - Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

***
I'm always dubious when it comes to these remakes. Their very existence confirms a lack of new ideas. However, being a massive fan of the original trilogy, I have to admit that, despite myself, I'd been rather looking forward to this film.

And does it disappoint? Well, yes and no. 'No' in the sense that it does nothing to taint past glories but 'yes' by way of not quite living up to those glories either.

Initially, the signs are good. It's 1957 and the Russians are led, by a suitably sinister Cate Blanchett, to find a mysterious artifact located in Area 51.

After Indy escapes the clutches of the 'Reds', and not before surviving an atom bomb test by taking refuge in a lead lined refrigerator (possibly the films most endearing moment), he's placed under suspicion by the FBI and suspended by the Dean of the School. Then, prompted by the arrival of Shia Laboeuf, who introduces the unsolved mystery which you just know Indy can't resist, it's off to discover a mythical city of gold using clues and riddles left by 'Ox', an eminent Professor and friend of Dr Jones, played by an underused John Hurt.

The foundations are laid firmly, but its at this point where things start to go a little awry. In the ensuing race between Indy and the Russians, all the initial charm seems to ebb away. What was an interesting FBI angle and a unique 1950's take on the ageing hero, is left almost completely behind and instead we start to get Indy by numbers.

In itself that need not be a problem, there being plenty to enjoy in the tomb raiding, jungle trailing and supernatural qualities of the enigmatic 'crystal' skull. However, we're met also by clumsy action sequences that feel more like filler than centre pieces.

For example, an extended military vehicle chase, mirroring 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' but more bloated, is free from any real sense of peril. By the time it culminates in an attack by super-sized, killer ants, you're left looking at your watch and wondering what silly circumstance might come next. Actually, the answer is promptly provided by a 3 tiered waterfall plunge. The problem is, having survived the 1st drop, there's no thrill in seeing it happen twice more!?

Having said all this, the climax of the film is genuinely thrilling and the extraterrestrial element adds an interesting new slant on things too. It's good, clean fun then, has all the ingredients required and it's great to see Ford excel revisiting a much loved character. I just wish I'd been more spellbound.

Saturday 15 November 2008

Wogan Worry

After a pleasant after work drink or two with the new Dr Watts in Covent Garden, I arrived home about 8 o'clock and settled down with Laura for an evening of Children in Need. It was full of the usual guff - singing newsreaders, dancing Eastenders etc, etc. but one thing struck me amongst all the goodwill and generous donating - Sir Terry.

Is it me or has he turned into the loosest canon since Bobby Ball's sidekick last paid a visit to his local? I know it was live telly, but if people think Brucie's doddery, they should have seen Wogan!! Either he's really lost it or he just simply doesn't give a toss anymore. Frequently, he would be openly unaware of to whom he was supposed to be linking, what item was next on the agenda and, at one point, was in completely the wrong place in the audience to meet a particular group of fundraisers. At this realisation, he comically looked to those seated around him, "This lot know less about why I'm here than I do!"

It was great to watch him snipe and snide his way through an evening supposed to be given over to goodwill, criticising celebrities for being unable to read out the donation telephone number correctly - somewhat hypocritically in the circumstances - and talking over co-presenters as they tried to hold it all together. At one point, I'm sure Terry had simply had enough and walked off. Hilarious, but it won't do him any favours.

Regardless of whether this was rebellious eccentricity or woeful incapability, I salute you Terry Wogan. It takes a lot to make Bruce Forsyth look slick!!! Still, I'd take either of those ageing masters over the awful Patrick Kielty or BBC golden boy Graham Norton.

Over our post work pint, Gaz mentioned his high regard for Jimmy Carr, suggesting he was the most likely of the current crop of comics to take over the mantle of the Monkhouse, Wogan, Forsyth generation. I hope so. Some are gone and others won't be around for much longer. I, for one, will miss them.

Thursday 13 November 2008

Electricityscape

Yesterday evening, being a Wednesday, was 5-a-side football night. As it was a 19:00 kick off I arranged, as usual, to meet Chris at Waterloo Station for 18:00 where we jump on a train direct to the footy. He doesn't finish until 17:30 and has just enough time to get from Old Street to Waterloo on the tube.

Meanwhile, I have an hour to kill, so usually take a slow stroll across town. When the weather's good it really is the most amazing of walks. I go past the Guildhall and on towards St Paul's Cathedral, which when lit up looks really imposing. I realise just how big it is.

Then down to the Thames and over the Millennium Bridge for great views of the river, Tower Bridge, The Globe Theatre and of course the Tate Modern. All that history and culture in such a small section of the city!!!

Once on the South Bank, I head away from the old power station past Gabriel's Wharf, it's muralled wall overlooking restaurants and boutiques, full of tourists and city dwellers sipping at continental beers and wines.

Before long, I reach the Royal National Theatre and the South Bank Centre with their sombre 50's style concrete. Here, there's a great collection of 2nd hand books on sale outside, laid out on rows of tables, a brilliant place to pick up the odd cheap novel or two.

Walking away from the river and past the London Studios I can see the London Eye up on high, the IMAX theatre through the gaps in the office blocks and then it's Waterloo Bridge and into the station.

Sometimes I'm amazed by how exciting and electric London can seem. Even though I've worked here for four years and lived in the city's shadow most of my life, I guess I'm still a little in awe of it. I've only ever been inside a handful of the places I've just described, a shame really, but I guess for some reason it's all a little intimidating. All that sensory overload!!! Yet that's what I love about London too - the infinite possibilities!!

Wednesday 12 November 2008

Monday 10 November 2008

Chris Kamara




Film Review - Quantum of Solace

****
I remember leaving the cinema after watching Casino Royale. I felt mixed emotions. I knew I'd just seen an amazing film, one that had redefined the oldest of movie franchises and ensured its continued existence, at least for the foreseeable future. I also knew that in Daniel Craig, I'd seen the most physical, most intense and yes, most emotional 007 ever. Somehow though, I still had this pang of regret.....it just wasn't Bond was it?

After the fallout, the dust settling on the most successful box office return of any Bond instalment, I could see through my nostalgia. This was necessary, this was a good thing and despite my initial misgivings, this was a very good movie. Besides, I could always go back to 'View to a Kill' for my grey leather jacketed, eye brow raised kicks!!

As many critics have suggested, Quantum of Solace is not as good as Casino Royale (although you have to qualify that statement by asking, "what other Bond film is that good?") However, it's still brimming with all the elements that made us swoon before. There's the heartbroken Bond, seething and remorseful, the realistic action scenes pleasingly devoid of CGI, there's the plot, twisting and turning at all the right moments. There is humour too, although now it's pleasantly understated rather than preceded by imaginary drum rolls.

The mysterious 'Quantum' group provide intrigue as MI6 struggles to ascertain exactly who they are and what they're up to, but perhaps most enjoyable of all, is the relationship between Bond and M. On more than one occasion, allusion is made to M's maternal instincts and Craig and Judy Dench's scenes together are essential in adding depth. Dench is a revelation as M and the decision to keep her on from the Brosnan era is a masterstroke. It's almost as if M is Bond's one, true love!! Freud would have a field day!!

Ironically, I found I enjoyed Quantum of Solace far more than its superior predecessor, relaxing into this new era and reveling in the smouldering cool of Daniel Craig - He almost defies comparison with previous Bond's, his take on the character being so skewed from the historic portrayal.

Quite where 007 goes in the next film, I'm really not sure. There's only so long you can maintain the lovers revenge plot line and I do worry that, this being tied up by the end of 'Quantum', he may lose some of his raison d'etre. Still, that's for a couple of years down the line. For now I'll sit back and enjoy. I may even get 'Royale' out from Blockbuster. Perhaps it deserves another chance!

Sunday 9 November 2008

Who do I think I am?

My Dad is heavily into his genealogy. Before he began, he knew very little about our family, even relatively little of his own Grandparents.

However, gradually, piece by piece and like a modern, non-drug taking Sherlock Holmes without the deer stalker, Dad has filled in the blanks with census data and old photos uncovered. It's all stored in a massive lever arch file, rapidly gaining something akin to Family Bible status.

Yesterday, the old man and I went to the National Archives at Kew. Ultimately, to meet a chap researching unsung racing heroes from the early part of the last century, although as a librarian I thought the place might be interesting too. He had come across Reginald Calvert-Empson (the great grandad mentioned in an earlier blog) and was amazed to hear my Dad was his only Grandchild.

Notes were duly swapped and more info was gathered by the erstwhile 'Holmes' (I guess that makes me Dr Watson!) Anyway, not only a racer but also a Captain in WW1, he was subject to an attack by gas resulting in hospitalisation. We saw his medical records from the time and even a hand written letter requesting leave due to his 8 year old daughter (my Nan) being injured when run down by a car!!!! Incredible!

***

I'd never felt particularly attached to my heritage (apart from the odd bit of sympathy for the Scottish national football team) but, as Dad's gradually unearthed the names and the places over the years, it's slowly started to seep through me. Turns out my Great Grandfather, John McRae, was a dairy farmer and that his Dad was Alexander McRae from a small village in the West Highlands called Balmacara. The McRae clan even have their own castle nearby called Eilean Donan.

A couple of years ago, Laura and I were on holiday in Scotland. We drove the hire car for 3 hours up through the amazing scenery of the highlands to find it. I hate those moments in shows like "Who Do you Think You Are?" - the money shot - where the celeb breaks down in tears at some pseudo grandiose revelation. However, although I didn't go so far as to shed a tear, there was a substantial lump in my throat at the sight of the castle.


It really is beautiful and nestles at the foot of the mountains, on a small island in the Loch. Walking around it made me feel immensely proud and most moving of all was the memorial listing McRae's lost in the world wars. Thinking about it, 'old Reggie" could so easily have ended up on one of these.

Balmacara, a hamlet, has a "McRae" grocers store among the tiny collection of buildings. Finally, my name up in lights!! I always knew this was my spiritual home!

Thursday 6 November 2008

Joe Strummer



Came across this photo again on the web. I've always loved it so thought I'd post it. He really looks the nuts!

Wednesday 5 November 2008

The Big 'O' (Reprise)

You do wonder whether it will end up being one of those, "Where were you when..." moments. Watching Obama's acceptance speech, it definitely felt like the start of a new period in world history. Were Noel Gallagher in attendance he'd have probably shouted, "Right here! Right now!" to the onlooking crowds.

Ironically, the last time I felt this sense of era shift was watching the attack on the World Trade Center. You knew things would never be the same again. In that case, of course, it wasn't for the better, and yes, I do remember where I was at the time - Watching TV in the staff room of WHSmith's. (I knew something major must have happened to interrupt the afternoon showing of Neighbours.)

Time will tell, but lets all hope Obama can live up to the great expectations! In the meantime, I'm just going to enjoy the fact he's the most eloquent and down right cool President I've ever seen. In other words, he's not George W Bush!!

Tuesday 4 November 2008

The Big 'O'

Election day is finally upon us!! I'm pretty relieved, it's been quite a build up. I do hope the swinging voters don't lose their nerve and Obama gets in. According to the polls, McCain should have had his chips, yet you do wonder if, when push comes to shove, middle America won't fall back on familiar ground.

There is an overwhelming hope that this could be a new dawn, not just for the U.S., but by association, the whole world. Could this be the moment that defines our future civilisation? The crises of global warming particularly seem to encapture the sentiment, "last chance saloon".

It's so frustrating that the lives of so many rest on the votes of, the relatively, so few. US citizenship? - Surely such a frivolous factor in deciding eligibility to vote!!!

US Citizenship? Frivolous? Tell that to the Mexicans.

Monday 3 November 2008

Phewis Hamilton

People hate Formula 1 motor racing. I can understand why, it has its issues.

In my case, my great-grandad raced on the banked circuit of Brooklands in the thirties. I'd be betraying my lineage not to pay at least a passing interest.

And what a ding-dong it was yesterday. Brilliant to see Hamilton scrape through to win the title and a big shout out to Mr Glock for geniously staying on slick tyres when things were getting a little bit moist.

Thankfully, Hamilton's too error prone to 'do a Schumacher' and dominate the sport for years (plus Alonso's still the best there is for my money), so here's to many more last lap title deciders.

p.s. Farewell David Coulthard. I'll never forget him waving his middle finger at Schumacher when chasing him down for the lead a few years back. Brilliant!!